It's those darn redheads . . .
I discovered a very peculiar thing on Saturday: I have eyelashes.
I discovered this as I was messing around with mascara. I've been trying to learn makeup, lately. At the ripe old age of 28. Lipstick made me notice I needed to do something with my eyes. Eyeliner helped, but something was still missing. I decided maybe it was mascara, and I was right.
I always assumed I had no eyelashes to speak of. Then I put mascara on them. It turns out, I have hella long eyelashes, they're just so light even I couldn't see them. Once I painted them, I realized that they actually run into my glasses on a regular basis. (Fortunately, I bought the waterproof mascara, so it didn't leave dirty spots on my glasses. I just made a note not to shove them quite so high up my nose). When I expressed this to my mother, she noted that I got everything about the redhead complexion but the actual red hair (mine comes out of a box), including the nearly-invisible eyelashes.
I started to put a little mascara on the bottom lashes and had to take it off again. With one coat on the top lashes, my eyes go from wow to heart-stopping. When I tried to paint the bottom lashes, the effect was positively obscene. Somewhere between porn slut and Tammy Faye Baker.
I discovered this as I was messing around with mascara. I've been trying to learn makeup, lately. At the ripe old age of 28. Lipstick made me notice I needed to do something with my eyes. Eyeliner helped, but something was still missing. I decided maybe it was mascara, and I was right.
I always assumed I had no eyelashes to speak of. Then I put mascara on them. It turns out, I have hella long eyelashes, they're just so light even I couldn't see them. Once I painted them, I realized that they actually run into my glasses on a regular basis. (Fortunately, I bought the waterproof mascara, so it didn't leave dirty spots on my glasses. I just made a note not to shove them quite so high up my nose). When I expressed this to my mother, she noted that I got everything about the redhead complexion but the actual red hair (mine comes out of a box), including the nearly-invisible eyelashes.
I started to put a little mascara on the bottom lashes and had to take it off again. With one coat on the top lashes, my eyes go from wow to heart-stopping. When I tried to paint the bottom lashes, the effect was positively obscene. Somewhere between porn slut and Tammy Faye Baker.
posted by Journey | 9:35 AM
3 Comments:
Top eyelashes = banal.
Bottom eyelashes = tawdry!
I never really appreciated the word tawdry until I walked down Oxford Street in London. The Brits, on a hot summer day, can do tawdry like no one else.
--durangodave
P.S. I like the sort of attention you bring to things that seem banal. It show the ways in which these things really do matter.
I just got the notice for my 20 year HS reunion. Don't think I'm gonna make it.... 20! Old as the hills and twice as dusty!
--durangodave
Well, if I can't be insightful, I might as well be entertaining. Glad you like it. ;)
:P I know people who feel that way about their ten year reunion. I think you're all silly. You're only as old as you want to be.
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